


I need some hope because I am the hopeless

by whiskeygirl17



Category: Hurt/Comfort - Fandom, Pain - Fandom, Romance - Fandom
Genre: F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-28
Updated: 2014-11-28
Packaged: 2018-02-27 08:11:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,002
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2685554
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/whiskeygirl17/pseuds/whiskeygirl17
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Soul loses her family, and then almost herself. This is the story of how she survived. This story is about love, death, pain, and lose.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I need some hope because I am the hopeless

I need some hope because I am the hopeless.

Prologue

When I was younger a teacher asked everyone in our class, "What do you want to be when you're older?"   
The answers were fired at the teacher like rockets, " A firefighter... a doctor... a vet." I hadn't said anything because even at that age I had knew that its not just 'what you want to be when you're older?...' it's 'who are you going to be when you are older?" How are you going to live your life?

Who are you going to be in life? Are you going to be a kind, thankful, smart person or a mean, nasty hater? There are always choices in life. Sometimes you pick the wrong way to go, and life lead you into a bad direction. Its your choice to get back on track.

But really? You don't even need a label. Labels stop you from trying to be better. They stop you from being all that you can be. There are things in life that will try to destroy you, try to break you. It's your job to help yourself. You can't always go to others.

You know friends are like nickels in a lifetime you might have hundreds of 'friends and nickels,' but eventually they all leave. Except for the real friends, they are like those nickels that stay in you pocket for years. They are real 'nickels'. They rust and crumble, yet stay strong for you when you need it.

Invulnerable is not able to be wounded or harmed.

No one is completely invulnerable. They might say they are, but its not true. Everyone has something in their lives that make them weak. If you find out what it is you can be that persons downfall.

My weakness was my love for my family.

 

The noise of the gunshot rang out from around all sides of the building. I can hear a woman screaming. Instead of being smart and running away from the noise... I run towards it. I run past people panicking and running towards the exit sign. I don’t really care. My heart is beating as fast as the wings of a bird. I ran up to the sound of another gunshot. I can see him lying on the ground. That's when I realized I knew who he was. Looking at him lying there was the last straw to my sanity. My only little brother is laying on the death bed. One bullet in his side and one in his chest. Tears running down my face I try to get to him but my legs wont even move and just drop me to the floor. Kneeling on the floor, memories flood back to me. Memories of good times with him. He is gone. My only family left is gone and I can’t even think straight. 

I’m sitting on the bench just outside of the small park that I had found while walking around this devastatingly beautiful city. Its a city that isn't like my home town. My hometown is so disgusting, and dirty, but here its so clean and beautiful. I stare at the sun going down over the water of the small lake. Streams of tears start rolling down my face and I can’t help but rub my stomach thinking of the little being that’s inside it. I lost my brother a year ago today. Since that day I said that I had no family left. Now looking down at my stomach and the little bump that is there I know I will have a family. It might not be a good family but it will be family. The little child in me did nothing for me to hate it, so why should I? The fact is because I didn't want the man that put it inside me. I know I can’t do it alone. I know I can’t take care of this child. I have no income, have no one to help me, and the worst part this child growing in me was from a man I didn't want to touch me. 

The sun is going down now and I can’t move. My feet literally won’t move from where they are planted. I’m like a wilting flower. I remember the day that I moved to Harrietville I thought everything would be better for me. Well that's what I thought. I had moved from a small city up North to get away from all the haters. When I had been sexually assaulted and had reported it to the cops I had been run out of town for apparently being a ‘rat’. Come on though, if someone sexually assaulted you or a friend what would you do? Most people would report it, keep it quiet or deal with the person through others. I had someone offer to cut him apart and through him in the river but instead I reported him to the cops. Not a smart move since people don’t know how to keep their thoughts to themselves. So here I am in a place where no one knows me and I love it. Yet I don’t have anyone to help me or my baby.

“Its either you or your baby,” the doctor said. I’m sitting on the hospital bed and tears are rolling down my face. The doctor and me are the only ones in the room.   
“I’m so sorry Miss. Laney but off the record I think since you have no family to take care of the child, it would be best to abort it.” I can’t stop. My mind is so confused. I don’t want to die but its my child.

I’m walking down my street to get to my apartment and all of a sudden I feel a jolt of pain. I fall to the ground and the next thing I know I am in the hospital.

“Soul, I’m sorry but your baby is gone.”

“NO, she can’t be gone!” I scream at the nurse.


End file.
